1. |
Simone
03:25
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you fuck me up like a horoscope
when you want to be sincere
you try so hard to be clever
that you're never clear
i'd bottom for you if you asked me to
but i'm dancing alone in the living room
and you're face down on the floor crying
that you wish you weren't queer
so i'll put my best face forward
but you know what a wreck i can be
i'm always getting in over my head
but never saying what i need
so i'll smile for the timeline and stare at ceilings alone
but i'm still not sure what to tell simone
you tear me down like an old lighthouse
when you ask me to get you high
i try so hard to fix things
that i'm never fine
you say can't really love me cause you hate yourself
you're too tired and broken to crawl up from hell
and now i'm texting into a black hole
that i'll never understand your mind
you put on your deepest scowl
but i know how kind you can be
a pillow princess flat on your back
afraid of what your weakness means
so i'll take your paintings off the wall block you from my phone
but i'm still not sure what to tell simone
dressing down won't save you from the pain of being seen
hiding yourself in a sea of cis machines
you can find a wife who'll carry, be the mother of your dreams
but to them you'll always be a faggot just like me
you can't take anything else from me
cause i've got nothing left but sympathy, pity
and the restless lonely energy of the freedom you gave me
i'll put my best face forward
but you know what a mess i can be
i'm always getting in over my head
but never saying what i need
so i'll throw away this dead bouquet and bury it in my bones
but i'm still not sure what to tell simone
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2. |
Cat's Song
03:42
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she's the quick one, the sad one, the fun one, the mean one
always telling friends how she wants to die
she never really means it, just takes everything she has to stay alive
wake up, disconnect the feeling, memorize the dots in the ceiling
smoking breakfast out her bedroom window
taking three days to text back, saying sorry i've been a drag
destroying everything she can to get control
she gave it all the money she had to make that settled feeling last
but she don't want consolation, she just needs absolution
she don't want sympathy, just needs her days to be easy
this city is a sinking ship, not big enough for wrecks like us
the future is a burning bridge, not bright enough to light me up
she's the tall one, the smol one, the kind one, the mom one
means well but never says what she means
always asking what's the matter but rarely gets the answer that she needs
she woke up in their apartment, the unsteady ground felt different
ugly crying at the kitchen table
taking three hits to think straight, saying sorry that i'm this way
cutting off everyone she can to feel stable
she gave it all the money she had to make that anchored feeling last
but she don't wants compliments, just needs conclusions
she don't want fantasies, just something close to happy
this city is a sinking ship, not big enough for wrecks like us
the future is a burning bridge, not bright enough to light me up
you were a hurricane, a barricade, romanticized insecticide
and everything i wanted to be
a kind-hearted coward, a clout chasing vampire
and the one that i still see in every dream
i gave you all the money i had to lock my nightmares in the past
you took the good parts and ran but what's the future worth anyway?
i'd probably do it all again
this city is a sinking ship, not big enough for wrecks like us
the future is a burning bridge, not bright enough to light me up
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3. |
Everything
03:26
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oh! fortune teller, what's in store for my life?
you’re perfectly prescient and ever so kind
give me all of the reasons you can't be my wife
where do i fit in this perfect design?
you wrote the script, memorized every line
and now you're killing yourself just to prove you're alive
I can carry you to bed, but i won't push you out the door
playing house until the game gets boring
and now you're tearing through the city
you can't blame yourself for trying to be happy
and chasing a life that gives you everything
say sorry, then obsess over every mistake
running away just to stay in the same place
disconnecting my head just to get through the day
the future follows my heels like a ghost
i want to be touched but need to be alone
we're both broken in all of the same ways
come carry me home and leave the light on when you go
fill me up with anything that's golden
cause even if i come up empty, i can't blame myself for trying to be happy
and chasing a life that gives me everything
is it too late for me? am i used up and spent?
i can't give you a baby, but i've still got love left
and i'm too old to chase down fantasies
but when you figure out what you want from me
i'll be three states over and way past apologies
cause we don't belong to who we used to be
i've stared down the edge of the cliff
been swallowed up by the abyss
i’ve held god in my hand
is this all there is?
but i won't let this break me
i can't hate myself for trying to be happy
and building a life that gives me everything
baby i'm ready for something steady
I've been to the brink and I'm never going back
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4. |
Broken Brain
03:23
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wake me up when it's my turn to drive
the radio cuts through the quiet at night
we both know this is ending, breaking up the bed
but if we just keep talking we can make it to sunrise
the wine's wearing off and the cloud's coming down
all the pitch perfect poison spilling from our mouths
you scream until your voice goes and strip me down my bones
cause you don't have the stomach to say it out loud
that i'm a brick up against the wall
you need a woman who can make you a mom
and my body just reminds you of your pain and regrets
another long mistake on the tip of my tongue
holding me down in the past
but i'm just a broken brain going out of my mind
trying to get my future back
everything's closing in and falling apart
repeat advice that been given but never took to heart
i'm bad at being who i want to be
i'll try to get myself together when i know where to start
if god made me, then explain me
and the frenetic static that surrounds me
if hell wants me, then come claim me
and give me some kind of purpose, some kind of meaning
what kind of world are you saving for?
what kind of death are you working towards?
haunted by lost lives while we fight to survive
the curtains come down while we beg for an encore
there’s plastic in our blood
cameras recording everyone
and the death cult of capital
keeps running running running running
an open casket wake at the edge of the known
a deathly grip hold on the past
but i'm just a broken brain at the end of the world
trying to get my future back
i'm just a broken brain at the end of the world
trying to get my future back
i'm just a broken brain at the end of the world
trying to get my future back
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5. |
Rose Quartz
03:52
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jet planes going the opposite way
contrails cut the sky, the only trace you left in your wake
get high, just killing some time
the ceiling softens and fades, a steady stream to get through the night
can't let you down if you take nothing from me
i know i'll never be the girl you need
now all that's left is a town split in two
and a cut quartz reminder to love myself as much as you do
it came to me in a dream waking up from surgery
i'm only really as alone as i want to be
from the waterfall to the curtain call, all in all it's been worth it
it's no one's fault but i'm giving up
cause now i know i can't love you enough for the both of us
in your arms i took my armor off
turned my volume up, believed i was enough
but just because we were happy once
don't mean we should get stuck in a life spent wondering
i hope you find someone who can love you better
i know i'm loved cause i feel loved
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6. |
Simone (Radio Edit)
03:25
|
|||
you mess me up like a horoscope
when you want to be sincere
you try so hard to be clever that you're never clear
i'd bottom for you, if you asked me to
but i'm dancing alone in the living room
and you're face down on the floor crying that you wish you weren't queer
so i'll put my best face forward but you know what a wreck i can be
i'm always getting in over my head but never saying what i need
so i'll smile for the timeline and stare at ceilings alone
but i'm still not sure what to tell simone
you tear me down like an old lighthouse
when you ask me to get you high
i try so hard to fix things that i'm never fine
you say can't really love me cause you hate yourself
you're too tired and broken to crawl up from hell
and now i'm texting into a black hole that i'll never understand your mind
you put on your deepest scowl but i know how kind you can be
a pillow princess flat on your back afraid of what your weakness means
so i'll take your paintings off the wall block you from my phone
but i'm still not sure what to tell simone
dressing down won't save you from the pain of being seen
hiding yourself in a sea of cis machines
you can find a wife who'll carry, be the mother of your dreams
but to them you'll always be a ****** just like me
you can't take anything else from me
cause i've got nothing left but sympathy, pity
and the restless lonely energy of the freedom you gave me
i'll put my best face forward but you know what a mess i can be
i'm always getting in over my head but never saying what i need
so i'll throw away this dead bouquet and bury it in my bones
but i'm still not sure what to tell simone
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